The Noisy Guest
Scratch Scratch Scratch came a sound at the door. Shuffle shuffle shuffle, went feet across the porch. Boom, Bang Crash! Little brother jumped, little sister hid, kitty cat hissed and puppy dog barked. Mama peeked through the window, Papa opened the door. Who was making all that noise. In the dark, snowy night, two shiny eyes looked up at Papa, a mama racoon stared back. "She looks tired," said little sister. "She looks hungry," said little brother. "She's going to have babies," said Mama. "Hiss, hiss," said kitty cat. "Bark, bark," said puppy dog. "I agree," said Papa, but he let her in anyway.
The snow melts and the sun shines. Little brother plays in a tree, little sister picks flowers, kitty cat chases birds, puppy dog buries a bone, Mama waters the garden and Papa cleans the shed. But Mama racoon and her little ones go "boom bang crash!" Sigh. Why did mama racoon have to find our door!
3 comments:
I like the shortness of this. I think the style is effective, and you do a lot in three paragraphs.
I'm not fond of the last sentence/wrap-up. It's not satisfying. It implies that the writer hates the racoons and resents the good deed done by the father. Is that the message you want to convey?
Salaam, Deb
www.macksbiz.wordpress.com
www.muslimahconfessions.blogspot.com
not really hate, but a strong dislike for the noise and mess that comes with the raccoons.
You are doing a great job I liked reading you blog and I loved keep on the good work on I don’t know if I have said it already or not but great wok tack care thank you
Post a Comment